pic by Shawna E.
I was used to live my life of expectations,
Of other visions, of what is supposed to be.
I haven’t looked out for myself,
Trusting it foolishly.
I locked deep inside, something precious,
Something that my conscious knew
It’s my truth.
I thought, I deserved the disaster of throwing away the key,
Of that treasure.
I have surrounded my faith
With the hands of those, whose beliefs were deceiving God.
I was used to a life,
To the predictable days of dishonest heartbeats,
And winter cold winds in my soul.
They followed me,
And ruled away my choices as they pleased,
Soaking me in despair,
As a dirty sponge of regrets.
The fear was greater than my being,
Not allowing me to listen to the common sense,
Appearing and knocking furiously in madness,
Through the foggy windows,
Yelling at me,
Urging me, that all have been fake.
I have been in a closed struggle of wooden walls,
As a prisoner of dark, annoying voices,
That wouldn’t shut up.
Then I heard a cardinal singing.
As the brightness of awakening.
The truth has unlocked its treasure,
By the single sound of it,
As the Christmas bells and chandeliers.
The crystal clear present of the real me,
Has stepped out of foolishness.
So much forsaken beauty stared at me in wonder,
Why did I waste so much time acknowledging it?